Assalamualaikum

Since dah terlalu lama I didn't write anything here, so it's a little bit weird kinda feeling..

Sebenarnya I was thinking to stop writing.Seriously, I don't even know what brings me here tonight.

maybe I'll start all over again since tonight. maybe.

well, here's the thing actually. I stop (for awhile) because Boyfriends were away, all of them. Yela the reasons why I write something here pun sebab Boyfriends, pasal dorang and when dorang were not besides I don't feel like writing anymore. macam x de desire pun.

2013 was the first year I lived without Boyfriends beside and I hardly survived of course. I (sometimes) lose myself. Well several times actually tapi what brings me back is the memories. The memories that we had (mostly pictures)

I misses them too much. too really really much!

Azza, Muslim and Ridzwan dah kerja, Alhamdullilah. 

Syahir sambung Degree dekat UiTM Samarahan. 

Aku? 

Am currently furthering my Degree (Bachelor in Administrative Science) in Shah Alam. Unfortunately, we'll be moving to Seremban next semester.



_______________________________________________

Dear Boyfriends,

We have different path now, and barely seeing each other. Next semester is harder since aku dah tak de dekat Shah Alam. How do I put this in words wei? the feeling is uncertain, tapi aku tahu yang aku sedih.

whatever! this is not gonna be about how do I feel anyway!

Merbok was perfectly perfect beautiful untuk aku and ALL OF THE CREDITS should goes to you. 

AZZARUDDIN ARIFF, 

Thanks for be there especially bila aku sedih. Well, each time bila aku sedih sebenarnya. To wipe my tears away and brings that smile, again. 

It's NOBLE  (:

Aku still ingat masa Malam Anugerah Video, kita kalah. I was sad and frustrated. I sat on the table and cried. Then you came and sat next to me buat benda apa tah (aku lupa). Much appreciated wei, I laughed again right after. No more tears cause you wiped it away (:

Then, there's another night when I skipped my Debate Training and decided to go barbecuing instead dengan korang kat Tanjung Dawai. Then masa aku nyaris nak terkantoi, aku nangis sebab I was too damm scared. That is the time you came acah acah nak buat aku gelak.. aku even ingat ayat kau Azza. Kau cakap "eh Wa, kau nak dengr cerita lawak x". HAHA.. aku tahu kau x de idea lansung pun nak cerita lawak apa masa tu tapi you just say it sebab aku dah nangis! kan kan? haha..
much appreciated what you did back then Azza . 

Since kau dah x de dengan aku dekat Seremban nanti, tolong doa kat Allah hantar orang macam kau jadi kawan aku bole? I just don't wanna lose that laugh and smile again.

be happy dengan Mimie sampai akhir hayat ea Azza. You deserve to have a happy happy life. You're too nice :D


RIDZWAN LATIF

One word Wan. Protective! that's you! kau macam Abang doe. Kau kasar luar tapi hati kau baik and I love you for that. Dalam kepala aku sekarang banyak benda aku nak tulis pasal kau, it just that I don't know how to put it nicely into sentences. No words can ever describe how do I felt pasal kau. Aku just tahu aku sayang kau and I never wanna lose you as my friend.

Kau tahu kenapa Wan?

 Kau nampak seorang yang x peduli tapi sebenarnya you care. It just that you don't show. Dalam kalangan Boyfriends kau la yang paling melayan aku Wan. Paling! Layan kerenah kebudak-budakan aku. Aku rasa aku ni kalau dengan lelaki lain dah kena lempang dah. I can be sooooooooo annoying and irritating and aku x tahu apa yang boleh membuatkan kau sabar layan kerenah aku. Aku memang salute kau untuk tu seriously. Banyak kali sebenarnya kau macam "acting" annoying and irritating nak mapus dengan kau sebab aku nak test tapi it looks like aku failed wei. dammmm!!

Paling aku terkejut masa malam tahun baru yang aku turun KL dengan kawan kawan aku and kitaorang decide nak pegi Highland Tower. Thou kau memang disagree at first tapi disebabkan aku ni merengek  nak pergi jugak, kau pun bawak. Sampai sesat semua tapi kau sabar je cari jalan sampai jumpa.. hihihi.. Last last still x dapat masuk..haihhhhhhhhh. Aku rasa tu balasan sebab aku susahkan kau la..haha.

Wan, even nanti aku dah pindah Seremban, kau still akan datang jumpa aku kan? pleaseee la cakap yes wei sebab kau la satu satunya harapan aku (to stand strong macam kat Merbok) since aku tahu kau ada rumah kat Seremban 2 and akan balik sana every weekend..

Azza and Muslim is too far :/

MUSLIM KHAIRI

I can said that you're "stabilizer" in my life. Hang tahu la Muslim, kawan hang  Wawa ni mudah lupa, leka and her immature behavior kadang kadang makan diri balik. Well, that is when you played your role well. Bila Wawa "lost" , hang selalu suruh Wawa back to basic, ingat Allah.Muslim macam air, yang akan neutralized kan balik semua benda. 2 tahun setengah kat Merbok, hang seorang je x pernah buli Wawa. Well maybe la ada sikit sikit tapi x teruk macam "dorang" buat.. hahaha..

Kawan yang baik, boleh diharap.I still remebered masa first week untuk degree, you came all the way dari Sunway semata-mata nak hantar setem hasil. Seriously Muslim, Wawa x tahu la hidup x de hang.

Alhamdullilah that you're working now and dah ada stable income. I am seriously happy for you Muslim, you know what you want and Allah ease everything for you. So lepas ni kawin la kan? hahah.. She a one lucky girl  :))
Hang jaga kawan aku tu baik baik. Dia mengadu apa apa kat aku hang jaga la! *cekak pinggang*
;P

By the way Muslim, if you ever feel like talking in English and got no one to talk to, you know my number kan. Text me! then we can talk broken english together gether sampai bengkak otak. serious.

SYAHIR ANUAR

:)))))))
Well I hope the emoticon above explain it all how do I felt about having you as one of my bestest bestfriend back then in Merbok. I do love your presence, your jokes, character and attitudes. It's warmth and comfy.

Good luck for your journey to come for your degree's life dekat Samarahan..aku x kan cakap "take care" sebab benda alah tu mainstream sangat, just a friendly reminder for u to be careful. Jangan sampai kena sumpit ke apa pulak kat sana nanti ;)

that's all .

*gaps*

Azza, Ridzwan,Muslim,Syahir,

I really am sorry for any wrong doing I've made.
I was immature, yes!

I really am sorry for depending too much on you,

I got no one to depend on.
my heart is at ease when you're there, that's why.

I really am sorry for loving you too much (as friend),

I too appreciate your presence in my life's journey.

I really am sorry if  my tex (at late night especially) bother your sleep,

I just misses you too much.

I really am sorry for the harsh words I ever said,

I got one to talk to.

I really am sorry for my imperfection,

I promise I'll learn from time to time as I grow older.

I really am sorry if this post will be last post.




First semester without you. First Finals without you.
I was in pain. It was hard, really hard. 

but that's the reality.

so it's all on me kan sekarang?

kan?

)':

I know I don't deserve this, but can I please ask one more last thing?

just one more.

That no matter where do we "go", what path do we choose, who do we decide to be with, what are we going to next, we still be friend.

I just too weak to let this friendship go. I don't even think I can do it because you're to valuable.

Till then,

I'lI pray to Allah to put you under His blessing and care, to ease everything for your life to come, and to keep you healthy and happy :)

p/s:  I wish I could write longer, but I don't wanna cry.

I'm weak, and you know why.

-WawaAzman,January2014-